Friday, April 15, 2011

RE: Girl Talk: I Want To Live Alone Forever

So I was reading a Girl Talk article on (Don't ask, this is what happens when I spend half my day randomly perusing websites.) and I was amazed at how similar my situation is to that of the article's writer, though she is several years older than me.
Here's the opening paragraph of her article.
I’ve made no secret of the fact that I eventually want a long-term, committed relationship and kids. But I’ve recently come to the realization that I also don’t think I ever want to share my living space with another adult. For the first time in my life, I live alone and I love it. These two desires—to have kids with someone and to live alone—do not really go hand in hand. Crap.
 My friends, my family, my readers, hell...even my neighbors and co-workers have probably figured out by now that I'm a 20 (nearly 21) year old bag of maternal instinct. I want children, or at least one child, and I want them desperately. I can't walk past a baby store at the mall without cooing adoringly over the clothing and the last time I was in Sanrio's Hello Kitty story I found myself plotting how I would decorate a girl's nursery with so much Hello Kitty and Friends stuff that she would likely kill me in later years.

I also find myself watching Say Yes To The Dress  on TLC more than I should and plotting out how my perfect wedding would I just need to find the other woman.

But dear and fluffy lord...I really have never even considered co-habitation with another person. Once I moved out of my parent's apartment I was out and on my own and I never even really wanted a roommate...much less one that actually sleeps in the same bed, uses the same shower as me and who I can't tell "these are my groceries, don't touch them." Roommates you can have rules with to some degree...significant others are an entirely different ballgame.

Why don't I want co-habitation?

Well, for several reasons.
1.) I like my privacy. I like being able to randomly sing Florence and the Machine songs in the shower and dance around to showtunes while I make dinner without anyone making fun of me.  Ideally I will meet someone who also does these things, or something similar, so neither of us has room to judge...

2.) Sharing a bedroom/bathroom is not all it's cracked up to be. I should know, I spent numerous years sharing a bedroom/bathroom with my younger sister...and for several years in my late pre-teens/early teens I lived in a house where my entire family shared one extremely tiny bathroom. *shudder* Anyone who has seen my bathroom now, can appreciate why I've expanded all of my make-up, jewelry and facial cleansers to take up ALL of the counter space.

3.) Sharing a bed is REALLY not all it's cracked up to be. I like cuddling and pillow talk as much as the next gal, but when you actually get right down to the sleeping part it's uncomfortable. Both you and your partner seem to grow 6 new knees and elbows and someone is always cutting off someone else's circulation and if you try to sleep on separate parts of the bed it feels you've had a fight or something and forget moving to the couch. Then you really will have a fight and nothing is fun about that.

4.) Splitting up chores and cleaning is difficult. When I lived at home there was usually at least 3 fights a week about the garbage, the dishes, the vacuuming, etc. Now that I live alone it's all up to me and I do it at my pace. If I don't feel like doing the dishes for a few days I can rinse them and leave them on the counter and no one will complain. I don't have to make the bed if I don't want to and I certainly don't have to put up clean clothes immediately (Proof being that the top of my dresser looks like a department store exploded on top of it, while my closet and dresser drawers are getting emptier every day.)

I suppose with all my whining it's pretty clear that my long term goals will resolve in living with someone and so I suppose I will just have to savor my time living alone.
I bet, in 10 years when I (hopefully) have a wife and child, I'll look bag at this blog entry and laugh so hard. I promise to do a follow up then, just so I can kick my own ass and prove that living with someone isn't so bad. Let it never be said that I won't admit when I'm wrong...even if it takes a decade or so to prove it.

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