Alright, firstly lets cover the good things going on in my personal life.
I got a new haircut, no I don't have pictures, but it's a haircut that would look sexy even if I rolled out of bed in the morning and left the house without remembering to comb it. I'm telling the truth, it is that sexy.
My neurologist is the coolest doctor in the world. He said he was willing to act like House, right down to the irascible attitude and walking with a limp, if it would make me feel better about all the...
Wait, that goes in the bad
all the blood work, MRIs and Lumbar Punctures in my future...yeah, that's not good. Got blood drawn today and I have to get more drawn tomorrow. Lucky me! *eyes roll at the level of sarcasm in the exclamation*
MRI is scheduled for Monday morning and then I get to be scheduled for a Lumbar Puncture if we don't find anything on the MRI. Don't I feel like a lucky girl, I get to experience first hand all the stuff that House talks about nearly every week.
As my mom said, these are "scraps" I would rather not have...even if they might make some of my writing more realistic.
Also I've found myself in an untenable situation. I'm sick, I have a job I hate, I live in a city that I basically hate (not as much as some places, but still...) and I'm days from signing a lease that will force me to stay in this city for another year. I know the planning for this move has been going down for a while, but it really started before I started getting really sick (I'll spare you the gory details, but these migraines have caused some...stomach emptying...to occur.) Now I feel like I'm juggling too much and my mom says I'm probably just freaking out over smaller things so I don't have to think about being sick...probably partly true.
I'm not sure where my life is going, but I don't think signing away another year of my life to live here is the right thing to do. I hate to screw over the people I was going to move in with, but I don't really see any other options. I don't think I should be making a decision to move while I'm not even sure what is wrong with my brain...it's not a good idea. I just want to stay in my nice, familiar apartment (a place I could navigate in my sleep by now) at least until I have a diagnosis and that could be weeks or months from now.
Once I'm healthy I can think about big life decisions, but I'm juggling too many things right now and I'm just not capable of doing it. I need to throw something out of this whirl of things and moving is the only option...believe me if I could just throw the possible brain tumor out the window instead I totally would.
Anyway, that's the update on my life.
If I've suitably bored you now, then it's time to move on to my second topic.
If you just skipped the opening update to read the interesting section then...I don't really blame you, but....SHAME ON YOU!
Anyway, I've basically fallen in love and, alternately, in depression with the Broadway musical Avenue Q. The play is about disillusioned college students with no purpose, bad jobs and sad lives...all living on Avenue Q. The play makes fun of RENT and Sesame Street and occasionally The Muppets. 'Cause, y'know...it's done with puppets...
Some of the songs seem like they were made to throw people like me, hopeless college dropouts with no plans for the future, into a hopeless funk and destroy their self worth.
Like this one
And this one, which makes some college graduates cry into their beer.
Then there are the songs like this one that make me laugh so hard.
or these two which are probably the most well known and probably the silliest.
Anyway, I love the cynical nature of the play and how it deals with the real world, not the fantasies that most Broadway shows love to peddle. Even For Now has a good message, even though it might make you cry. Sometimes you can't have exactly what you want right off the bat, sometimes you will spend a long time looking for your purpose. But as long as you have a job and a place to live, really what's so wrong with your life? It's better than most people's for sure. That doesn't mean you shouldn't strive for more or try to find your purpose because you never know when you might lose that job or lose that place to live, it's all just...for now.
Also, it's rare to find a Broadway musical (an area known for it's left leaning politics) that has both jabs at George Bush "George Bush is only for now!" and jokes about immigrants not learning English "Just little things, like thinking Mexican busboys should learn goddamn English!" and I love that! It's like the play was made for my political leanings and that's a rare thing indeed.
Anyway, a local theater company is doing a production this month and I'm definitely going to see it. I'm so happy about that because I missed it when the Broadway tour came through town...I was a little broke at the time. I'm still a little broke, just not quite as much...I can squeeze out $40 for a ticket to this play though. I'll give you a better review when I've done more than just listen to the soundtrack obsessively.