Friday, December 25, 2009

3 month anniversary

So my girlfriend and I can not be together for our anniversary yet again. I fully intend to make up for that when she gets home from her winter vacation. We've been together for 3 months now and I feel kinda sappy (just like last month) to be celebrating that fact. The honest truth though is that I celebrate each and every day that we are together. She is undoubtedly the best thing to happen to me in a very long while.

Ma Cherie, I can't wait to see you again!

Monday, December 21, 2009


I was just reading my previous post and it occurred to me that I ended it a bit abruptly. Sorry, I was in a hurry to get to the mall when I was typing the last bit.

I'm not about to make any abrupt, crazy changes to my life. I just know that I need to start consider things and not trying to ignore them. I've been pushing anything uncomfortable to the side and not wanting to think about the future, because it honestly scares the shit out of me.

I guess I'm sort of reminded of this shirt from Questionable Content when thinking of my life.

It's the honest to god truth. I've made bad decisions, I've put off acting like an adult and now I have to lay down in the bed I've made. I'm scared stiff.

I have dreams, things I really truly want to do with my life. If I don't do these things I know in the end I will regret not at least trying. At the same time, these dreams would take me away from someone that I am falling for more and more each day. I have different advice from all my friends on the subject, but I have to make decisions for myself and stop leaning on other people to make decisions for me.

I don't know why life has to be so confusing, but it is and I want so badly to make the right decisions. The decisions that will make me happy, but there are so many conflicting things that I want in my life.

So that's the story, it's gonna be difficult, but I hope that I can pull through.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Brittany Murphy dies at 32

What is it with the famous all keeling over this year. My girlfriend wondered who would be the next 2 to go out, since dying in threes is all the rage this year. The funny thing is that, while none of those who have died (Brittany being the exception) were extremely young, but their deaths got me thinking about my life in general.

Michael Jackson, Billy Mays, and Brittany Murphy were icons while I was growing up. I remember them from movies, music, television and commercials. I watch Clueless religiously in Elementary school. I think it's a bit of a shock to find these people dying during my life time. They always seemed...timeless I suppose.

I started thinking this morning after I read about Murphy's death. She was only a year older than my brother when she died and here I am doing NOTHING with my life. I could die, it happens everyday to people my age and younger. The possibility is there. Sure, the people I know would miss me, would be sad, but would anyone else care? I have to start living my life and as much as I hate it, it also means I have to start acting like an adult. The future can't be paused for me until I'm ready for it.

I don't know exactly what this "epiphany" will do for my life, but I know something has to change.

Happy Birthday to You!

Just posting to say happy birthday to my friend over at The Conservative New Ager, we may not always agree on everything (though we do agree on more things than most people would think), but he is still my friend.

Happy Birthday, even if your birthday is at a sucky time of year. Even if you only get enough presents for one of the celebrations, I'm sure you will still enjoy it!