Monday, October 26, 2009

NaNoWriMo, spending quality time with my amazing girlfriend and dealing with small acts of homophobia.

I got to spend the weekend with my girlfriend and it was the most amazing weekend I've had in a very long time. We went to a the State fair Friday night and to a Hockey game Saturday. Surprisingly enough I really enjoyed the Hockey game...I am becoming more and more lesbian as the days go by *laughter*.
Sunday we rode the bus up to a park to meet with a bunch of other NaNo writers. We had an awesome time eating lunch and generally being wacky. You get a bunch of writer's together (which is like herding cats, since we are all such hermits) and strange events and conversation will ensue. After that we rode the bus down to a bookstore for a meeting I had to go to for the anime convention I'm staffing for. We had some mishaps finding busses and some long waits, but both were worth it just to be able to spend time with each other without other people bothering us.

My plot for NaNo is slowly starting to coalesce. I bought a GLBT young adult fiction yesterday at the bookstore. It's name is Crush and I'm reading that as well as re-reading Annie on My Mind. Hopefully both of those will help me get a feel for the voice I should use in this attempt. I'm hoping to actually finish this story and maybe even get to editing it. I actually feel strongly about this story line and if it's good enough I would really like to submit it to a publisher.

You know what's funny about being a lesbian is the fact that I've never personally dealt with homophobia towards me personally...not really any way. Sure I've heard the slurs and heard my parents say some not so nice things here and there. I've read the news stories, supported the hate crime bills and debated online with people, however the feeling you get in those situations is much different than the one you get when it's directed at you specifically.

Saturday afternoon my girlfriend and I walked a mile or so to a grocery store to get a bus pass for me and some cookies for the potluck picnic. As we walked I grabbed her hand out of habit and as we walked along we were honked at numerous times, looked at strangely at intersections and were shouted at by people in passing cars.
She told me that she'd never had that problem before in her neighborhood and we sort of laughed it off when she told me that it must mean that people think I'm cuter than her. We didn't really change the way we did anything, we kept holding hands. In fact we didn't do much hiding of our relationship at all the whole weekend, which was refreshingly freeing for me. We really needed this weekend.

On the way back to her house we held hands most of the way, except for when we saw two guys heading the opposite way and we stopped till they had passed. I understood the reason for doing so and I don't mind, but it just frustrates me.
If one of us had been a guy there would have been no need to seperate and no one in those cars driving by would have had an issue with us. No one would have felt the need to react in any way what-so-ever and that is what pisses me off. I hate not feeling sure of how I should introduce us. I guess it's a case-by-case sort of thing, but really how do you tell whether a person is going to react badly to me saying, "Hi, I'm Meredith and this is my girlfriend...". I don't want to make what we have purely private. We are dating when no one is around, but just friends in public. That doesn't fly for me or for her. I'll just have to grow a thicker skin.

However, despite everything I'm kind of glad this happened. It gave me a personal insight into how that sort of reaction feels and considering the book I am trying to write, that will be of use to me.

So in short, I had a magnificent weekend which will be repeated soon I hope. Next weekend will be filled up by staffing Sabotencon in Mesa. It will be 3 days of lost kids, "lost my badge...and my ticket, can I get a new one?", and fangirls harrassing Steve Blum and Vic Mignogna. I hope I survive...keep your fingers crossed for me okay.

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